Friends . . . .

It has been an absolute joy this week to get back in touch with an old and very dear friend of mine - courtesy of Facebook.

We have known each other since we were 13 and were extremely close until we reached our early 30's when we suddenly and for no particular reason started to drift apart. New people came into our lives, different work commitments, etc meant that we eventually and sadly lost touch.

My friend was always such an inspiration to me - she was the one who reached for the stars and grabbed them with both hands, while I just stood and admired them from a distance.

She was the one who knew exactly what she wanted and how she was going to get it, no obstacle was too big that it couldn't be got over. I was the one who always erred on the side of caution and was far to shy to take chances without any guarantees of success attached.

If we were to be compared to the tortoise and the hare, she was definitely the hare!! And a beautiful one - inside and out.

It has been a delight to 'chat' on the airwaves and from seeing a couple of photos and reading a couple of news articles of her, on the surface she seems to be a very successful business woman and charity fund raiser, mixing with TV stars and other famous people and I am enormously pleased for her.

But what has pleased me the most is this........

I do sometimes wonder how much I have grown since becoming a Christian in 1997. I do grow in my knowledge and understanding of the scriptures, but how much have I grown as a person?

This week, having had a very brief insight into the success and glamour of my dear friend I realise that I don't want what she has or want to be like her.

I am content in who I am. In who I am in Christ.

There was a time that I wouldn't have been able to say this. There was a time that I strived to be someone I really wasn't - I'd dress a certain way; have my hair a certain way; go to places I wouldn't normally go, etc, etc and all this was to simply "fit-in" with other peoples way of life. Their lifestyle. The thing was, I never felt that I did fit in, I always felt odd or that there was something missing, not right.

But it is only in these last couple of days that I fully realise that "I am who I am " and that's it. I don't have to fit in. I can wear what I want, do my hair the way I want and not go places which make me feel uncomfortable (not that I've done this for a while now but I'm just trying to make a point.)

If I do a fund raising event and raise £265 and my friend does one and raises just over £9,000 - so what. It doesn't mean that she is better than me. It does mean that we were both doing something to help others less fortunate that we are.

I think I have always felt that I wasn't good enough - what I did wasn't good enough, what I said wasn't good enough, etc - not in a floppy pathetic way, just something I observed in myself.

But this week all that changed - Praise God. And I realise how much I have grown and how my relationship with God and the life He chooses for me is far more important and tangible than anything else.

I am extremely proud of all my friend has achieved and I hope and pray that our friendship will grow from here and become 'real' rather than 'over the Internet airways'. I am excited at the prospect of seeing her again.

But I am also extremely thankful that I can say, with Paul,

"..... for I have learned in whatever state I am in, to be content"
Philippians 4 v 11

I am content in who I am. With who I am in Christ.

Contentment in Christ brings great freedom.